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Taming Tears

To tame those tears let's start by keeping things simple.

1-Slow Down:

You just had a baby and you need to focus on just 2 things.  Your baby and You.  Everything else can and should wait.  Give yourself permission to say "No" to visitors, appointments, work..etc.  Remebmer that your body just went through physiological, hormonal and emotional changes and you need time to recover.  It's OK.  You need your rest and you need alone time with your baby to get to know your baby.

2-Step Back:

Crying during infancy is not emotional but rather reflexive or communicative. Either your baby is trying to tell you something or releasing pent up energy. Either way, it is not an attack on your competence as a mother or father.
Do a Quick Check:  So why could your baby be crying?

**Hungry? 

Feed your baby.  If you are nursing and having difficulty don't wait to get help.  Get help and nip problems in the bud.

**Needs to Burp?

Vary your burping position.  Think about massage techniques that help.

**Dirty Diaper?

The easiest, but be quick or you'll be sure to go through a few changes of clothes. :-)

**Needs to be held? 

This sometimes seems to be the most misunderstood.  Babies NEED to be held.  They were warm, cozy and in fetal position for 9 months and now they are brought into a bright cold world and placed in a bassinet away from their mother.  Of course they would cry!  Many mothers are told that if they carry their baby too much they are going to spoil the baby.  That's just not true, especially in the newborn phase.  You are simply meeting your baby's need for warmth and security.  So go ahead and hold your baby and better yet, wear your baby.

**Tired?

The baby simply needs to nap. Unfortunately, sometimes it's just not that easy.  Avoid overstimulating your baby. Limit visitors and let the baby rest when you see signs of tiredness. 

Let's adjust the expectations. Healthy newborns cry...strong and loud.  So slowing down and taking a step back will help you put things in perspective. Crying is a necessity, it helps parents bond with their babies as well as meeting the needs your baby has.....BUT what if nothing seems to work.... Then it's time to use these time tested techniques.

3-TOOLS OF THE TRADE - "The Happiest Baby On The Block Method for Calming Colic" ~Harvey Karp, M.D.

  • Swaddling - Swaddling provides the continuous touching and support the baby experienced while still in Mom's womb. There is some controversy when it comes to swaddling, but like with everything else, use good parenting judgement.  Do not over tighten a swaddle. Always make sure your baby is waking at regular intervals. Swaddling may suppress hunger cues so make sure you are waking your baby to feed.   
  • Side/stomach position - You place your baby, while holding her, either on her left side to assist in digestion, or on her stomach to provide reassuring support. Once your baby is happily asleep, you can safely put her in her crib, on her back.
  • Shushing Sounds - These sounds imitate the continual whooshing sound made by the blood flowing through arteries near the womb. This white noise can be in the form of you "Shushing" in the baby's ear, a vacuum cleaner, a fan, however, white noise CDs seem to be the most practical.  
  • Swinging - Newborns are used to the swinging motions that were present when they were still in Mom's womb. Every step mom took, every movement caused a swinging motion for your baby. Rocking, car rides, and other swinging movements all can help.
  • Sucking - "Sucking has its effects deep within the nervous system," notes Karp, "and triggers the calming reflex and releases natural chemicals within the brain." This "S" can be accomplished with breast, bottle, pacifier or even a finger.

*The above information is not medical advice and is not intended to replace consultation with your physician.  Our goal is to provide information that will prompt further discussion with your primary care provider. If you have concerns about your health or the health of your child please contact your healthcare provider.

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